Liberated Life
Have you experienced loss or trauma in your life? Have you ever silenced your grief and pushed it deep down? In episode one of my Breaking Free podcast, ‘Liberated Life with Ellen Newhouse’, I am joined by Ellen, healer, speaker, and author of ‘Nothing Ever Goes on Here: A Memoir’. Her story is incredibly moving and an important example of how one person can be the catalyst to break generations of abusive upbringings. It is truly inspiring.
It sounds cheesy, but healing is a process
Though it might take us years to realize, it’s essential to understand that everyone’s experiences - positive or negative - shape their lives in incredible ways. No matter what has happened, you can improve your life and create a new one that fills you with happiness. When I spoke with Ellen, this was such a strong message that I took away with me, and I am still thankful today for how much it resonated with me. Healing can be so messy, horribly messy! You might even feel worse while unravelling the ‘mess’, but you will come out the other end if you stay on your own path - follow the process because it works; you just have to let it. This comes from someone that never listened to anything they were told … me. But with time, I learnt to, and guess what? It’s been pretty damn eye-opening at times.
Ellen and I spoke in great depth about how everything can look good on the surface – you might have plenty of money and a beautiful home – but inside, it’s often a different story. I imagine loads of you are nodding because you can relate. At one time, this was me too. It’s the inside that we need to heal by allowing ourselves to feel exposed and vulnerable again. Our lives can change in incredible ways with something as simple as a conversation with a friend or, for some, a religious experience. We just have to allow that inner strength to rise to the surface. Ellen’s life was changed, as was mine, and yours can change too, I promise.
It's time to make a change…
Many people are brought up in mentally and physically abusive households, and the role of the parent can switch to the child. This is something that shaped Ellen’s early years of her life. That abuse can dictate how we go on to live our ‘adult lives’. It can map out how we relate to those around us. Co-dependency and rescue syndrome is often a pattern we fall into, however, tiring it feels. Ellen found herself trapped in that same cycle. She was so familiar with that role that she never allowed others to do the caring instead. Although many of us experience a feeling of ‘no choice’ as children, we very much have a choice as adults. Once the pattern of behaviours is broken and the generational cycle of abuse has ended, you can start your recovery. Ellen made that change and shared that journey with me.
To hear the whole podcast, visit Breaking Free: Liberated Life with Ellen Newhouse on Apple Podcasts